Friends Don’t Let Friends Wear Boleros

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This has been a fantastic weekend so far, dear readers, and I feel extremely content as I sit on the couch with my laptop, comfy in my favorite old college sweatshirt, Noodles on his new-favorite perch in the window looking out at the partly-sunny day. Friday night J. and I went to see American Gangster, which I highly recommend. Russell Crowe, who normally bugs me a little because of his offscreen, hot-shit persona (ok, women of America, scream in horror that I don’t adore him), plays a Jersey cop who is flawed and yet impossible not to root for. They definitely uglied him up for the role, too, with some pudge and clothes that included a blue Hawaiian shirt. And Denzel, as Frank Lucas was perfectly terrifying. Two thumbs up.

Then on Saturday night I went to see Wicked, which I thought was incredible. I had no idea till I got there that Knittikins had bought seats in the second row, but we were right in the action, and the singing and costuming were fantastic.

But the real highlight of the weekend was round 2 of wedding gown shopping with Knittikins. After round 1, in which she tried on some gorgeous gowns, she decided that a floor length gown with a train was just too– well, gowny for a backyard wedding whose menu will include ribs (I see her point), and she began suggesting that instead she might wear a “sundress.”

While I am ever the obedient, supportive friend/bridesmaid when the situation calls for it, Knittikins has admonished us that we have to use tough love with her and that, as she told her younger sister Adorable yesterday, we are charged with the responsibility of making sure she doesn’t wind up looking ugly on her wedding day. Now, I have no doubt in my mind that she will look beautiful, whether in a gown or a sundress or anything in between. (Knittikins — note that a T-shirt and khakis are NOT on the list of options. Ahem.) But in my mind, when one is hiring a professional photographer to capture the event for time immemorial, one wants to look as perfect as possible. And wedding gowns, beasts that the are, are structured in such a way that no matter how much you move and breathe and eat and laugh and dance and greet people, the dress supports you. So, to that end, I suggested to Knittikins that she try on some more casual and/or tea length gowns, rather than moving away from gowns entirely.

From there ensued a morning at Alfred Angelo, which is much more user-friendly and down-to-earth than the environment at Renee Strauss the prior weekend. While the Renee Strauss lady had seemed borderline-horrfied that we all wanted to sit around in the giant dressing area together, the AA lady had no qualms about letting Knittikins, Adorable and I squeeze into the tiny dressing room together with her. I was also allowed to wander around at my leisure, choosing out gowns for Knittikins to try on, which was fun. And best of all, unlike most bridal shops, AA lets you take pictures, so I was able to be the paparazzi (paparazzo? hmm) I love to be. Knittikins’ other sister, my best college friend/former roommate C., had to work, so we were able to take lots of photos to show her in anticipation of her going back with Knittikins soon. (C. informed Knittikins that, understandably, she would never forgive her if she bought a gown without C.)

There were some good choices — the best, in my opinion and Adorable’s, was a tea length strapless dress that gave Knittikins a tiny little waist and was just, for lack of a better word, so damn CUTE. We’ll see what she ultimately decides to do. But the biggest fashion disaster of the day, that took some definite tough love to steer Knittkins away from, was her inexplicable desire to ruin the gorgeous, simple strapless dress by wearing a bolero. I wish I could locate a photo of this, but you’ll just have to take my word for it. Long sleeved, heavy satin-y material (can we remind you that the wedding will be in June in the Valley?)…just unnecessary. Knittikins exclaimed, “But it’s so comfy! I feel like I’m wearing a T-shirt!” (Wearing a T-shirt on her wedding day is her deep-seated desire, that we will absolutely not allow.) As Adorable asked, “Why in the world would you want to Pretty In Pink your dress?” Aka, why take a pretty dress and mess it up? Well put.

Anyway, dear readers, I really want nothing more than for Knittikins to have her wedding exactly the way she always imagined it. And I will support her and help her do anything to achieve that vision.

Unless, of course, that vision includes a bolero…

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